The authors of  “I Hate People”, Jonathan Littman and Marc Hershon were so gracious for sending over a few copies of their latest and greatest creation.

Review
“I Hate People! is the definitive guide for creating a job you love – even though you are trapped with jerks and creeps of every stripe. Littman and Hershon tell great stories, give inspired advice, and wrap it all in the most fun management book since Orbiting the Giant Hairball.” –Robert I. Sutton, author of The No Asshole Rule and professor of management science and engineering, Stanford University

Want to win a copy of the book? I’ve got 4 copies to give away.  All you have to do is tell me (without naming names) which one of your co-workers you loathe and why – use the comments section below – and I’ll pick best of the best.

Unleash the hounds….

One of my more recent articles was written by a long time technical contact and friend of mine titled “7 Things That Recruiters Do To Irritate Me”.  Apparently it wasn’t clear who actually wrote the “meat” of that posting but it was someone who’d dealt with recruiters for the last several years as a candidate/job seeker.  I added a few talking points but it was more of an outlet for someone that I have a pile of respect for and though that his opinions should be heard by my readers.

10 Things That Recruiters Do That Irritate Me – A Recruiter

2 bit hustlers, handlers, pimps, brokers, body shops, douche bags and schmarmy placement firm ass hats, this one’s for you.

1. Assuming that you are the more important than your client – the person sitting across the table from you.  We both need each other so drop the ‘tude.
2. Showing up late for the interview you scheduled but holding against the job seeker when they are late – even if there’s a valid excuse.  (kids, traffic, car trouble)
3. Answering your cell phone or replying to emails during an interview….that you (recruiter) scheduled.
4. Requiring the job seeker to sign an agreement (not called a “contract” until later) before agreeing the to the  “privileged” of being interviewed by you.
5. Submitting candidates to multiple clients without the permission of the job seeker, only to “mark your territory.”
6. Not providing feedback if your candidate doesn’t do well on an interview with your client.  No one likes to be the bearer of bad news but grow up and do your job.
7. Assuming that if a person has an accent, that you need to speak louder.  The volume of your voice doesn’t automatically convert your over pronounced shrill into Spanish, French, Hindi, etc. (see video below)
8. Scheduling an interview late in the afternoon on Friday but rescheduling because you want to leave the office early.  L A M E If you can’t keep your schedule, don’t make the appointment.  We all want to go home early on Friday.  It’s not easy for people to move their schedule around and it’s very disrespectful.
9. Not providing all the information for a job seeker to make an informed decision.  (Ohhhh…yeahhh….I forgot to tell you that one day a week you have to clean out the refrigerator…sorry ’bout that!)
10. Being dishonest….no excuse.  That’s why you are a schmarmy ass hat.

I’d like to welcome my ONLY sponsor – Eric Ross Winery.   While in Sonoma, California a few weeks back I waltzed into his winery and was lucky enough to have Eric Luse – the wine maker – pouring samples.  I’ll admit it, I’m a beer kinda guy and have wine on special occasions but after hearing him talk about the art behind his wines, I was all ears (and liver).  If you have a chance, click the button on the right side of the page and pay him a visit.  If you are in Sonoma, stop by and tell him that I sent you and he’ll take good care of you.

Follow Eric Ross Winery on Twitter here.

I also recieved a suggestion from another reader that it should read:
if( !dishwasher_full && have_dirty_dish) {
insert_dirty_dish();
if (dishwasher_full || motherinlaw_is_coming){
start_dishwasher();
}
{
if ( dishwasher_clean) {
empty_dishwasher();}

Geek humor is the best kind…..

Alltop.com recently added TheAntiPimp.com to it’s “Top Career News” page.  So, what’s in it for me?

• For those that visit Alltop.com and even more specific the Career section, you’ll see my site
• I get to have a really cool button that says “kick ass” on the front of my page
• I can say that I’ve actually exchanged emails with Guy Kawasaki
• My fervor is even more widespread.  Sorta like swine flu.

Seriously – if you’ve not set up an Alltop page, now is the time.  Guy Kawasaki and his minions are kicking serious ass with the setup of this site.

What is it? – Alltop is an online magazine rack of popular topics.  You tell them what you are interested in and they’ll bring you the best stories from the web.

How does Alltop decide who’s site is added?

They use a patent-pending, semantic computational algorithm derived from the post-doctoral work of Guy Kawasaki at Stanford.  Just kidding.  They rely on several sources: results of Google searches, review of the sites’ and blogs’ content, researchers, and their “gut” plus the recommendations of the Twitter community, owners of the sites and blogs, and people who care enough to write to us.

Catch up to 2009 and set up your shizzle here.

Don’t complain to me because you can’t smoke near the building, in a bar or in your car with the windows rolled up and 2 screaming kids in the back seat.  I have no sympathy.

Research shows that if you admit that you smoke, your chances of getting a job are much lower than a non-smoker. Current work environments are so enclosed (read – “cube farms”) that a smokers “scent” is just as much of an irritant than someone that wears too much perfume or has poor hygiene.   New allergies are surfacing daily and more recently the number of people with tobacco smoke related allergies has sky rocketed.  In addition, employers are making it more difficult to smoke on the job by requiring employees to move a certain distance from the entrance from certain buildings so as not to affect others.  It’s caught on because state governments are now passing laws to prohibit smoking within a certain distance of a building.

“Smoke breaks” average 39 minutes per day. Statistics show that smokers typically take 3 smoke breaks each workday averaging 13 minutes apiece. If an employee is paid $13 bucks an hour, the state of Michigan, for example, spends $1.7 billion on smoke breaks.  So – in addition to your lunch break, bathroom breaks and smoking breaks, your true hours of productive work that should be 7 to 8 are actually at 5 to 6.

I have ZERO sympathy for smokers that bitch and moan about thier “right” to smoke.  Unbelievably there are websites built especially for these yellow teethed hounds to hunt down places where they can smoke with out being hassled.

Get over it.  Drop the habit, do your job and make more money so you can retire early.  Although you may die an early death because you spent your early years sucking down 4 packs a day.  Don’t be a loser.

My mom will hate this but it’s so true.  My wife and I eloped and when I called home to tell them that I’d gotten married, my mom replied, “Really!  That’s great!  Guess what?  I got a puppy and her name is Honey!!”. We are a dog family…that’s pretty clear.

When you turn the age where it’s time to leave home, go to college, get a job and start your own life, there’s a certain amount of joy – “Hell yes!  I’m out!  I’m free!  On to utter debauchery, sleeping until 3pm and never having to answer to your parents again”.  Then your job starts, you get married, pay bills and start doing the typical visits back to your parents home every so often.

There’s always a certain comfort in going home again.  The smells that hang in the air and rub you on the cheek as soon as you walk in the door and then almost envelope you to say “Welcome back kiddo”.  For me, as a kid, we always had dogs.  Just as the smell of home was comforting, so was the jingle of our pets tags on their collars.  It’s funny to me still that when you take off a dogs collar how they want to smell it and look at it with their heads cocked to one side as to say, “ohhh..that’s the thing that makes that clinky noise”.  I’ve never had to chase my dog down to put her collar(s) back on…she always seemed to want it on.

The even better part of coming home again is seeing my parents and their new “kids”.  To see my mom and dad fawn over a dog is one of the coolest things ever.  My mom has always had a pet…an emphasis on mom’s pet.  Dad was always working and never had time for a “dumb ol’ dog”.   Today my mom works less and my dad works much less and is home much more.  Being at home more, they’ve both grown even closer to their pets and treat them like humans.  Funny and silly and true.  Having never seen my dad (who’s a tough old bird, blue collar, ex-navy, truck driving, non-filter cigarette smoking (he quit a long time ago), nail spittin’ type of fella) roll around in the den floor and play with a dog as a “retired old guy” is one of the sweetest things I’ve ever seen.  Mom has always had an undying affection for our animals and I think that’s where I get it.

My mom and dad both have their own dog.  They are everyones dogs, but I know one is my dads and one is my moms.  My wife called me today to tell me that she’d spoken to my mother and that my dad had been upset most of the morning.  Honey – his dog – hadn’t eaten in a couple of days.  Dad took her to the vet this morning and they found an inoperable tumor on her spleen and is in very bad pain.  She’s got a couple of days to live.  To hear my mother and father cry is one of the toughest things I’ve ever endured.  I’ve seen my mom cry at movies and regular girl type stuff but to hear my father, my hero and my rock, hold his breath so he didn’t cry, brought me to my knees.  I know, I know..it’s a dog.  It’s a my dads friend.  Mom knows that it’s his friend and that makes it equally tough, if not more.

Today or tomorrow my parents have the daunting task of euthanizing their pet and friend.  Sadly enough, I go back home this weekend for a family reunion.  I won’t hear Honeys collar jingle when I open the door.

Honey has brought joy, companionship, comfort, a cold nose and a scratchy paw to my family and I’ll forever be grateful to her.

Honey is a good ol’ dog – my dad.

I wrote this for myself.  I wrote it for my parents. I wrote it for my wife.  If you are a pet owner, I wrote it for you.  Hug your pets and remember how much unconditional love they provide in their short lives.

From my homie Laurie Ruettimann at PunkRockHR- published writer, recruiter, trainer and all around bad ass.  This is a hilarious post that I thought everyone would enjoy.

Thanks Laurie!

Reader question.

What are your thoughts on non-exempt employees getting personal calls on their cell phones during normal working hours?

Here are my thoughts: when it comes down to it, we are all hourly. The differentiation between exempt and non-exempt is sketchy—and I call bullshit on the whole entire structure. My corporate legal team asked me to move a group of secretaries to exempt, one year, and had me move another group of secretaries to the non-exempt status. Then we flipped it all around and changed them back. It was a nightmare, and if I hear one more employment lawyer blame it on the evolving interpretation of FLSA rules, I am going to barf.

That being said, I don’t care if someone takes a call during work unless it’s obnoxious, distracting the employee from work, or it is a safety issue. This covers all employees, non-exempt or exempt from overtime.

Here are some examples where people shouldn’t yammer on a mobile phone.

• You work at Wendy’s? Put down the phone. You are paid to keep the place clean and provide service to your customers. There’s no time to chat on the phone unless you score 100% on both fronts.
• You are a receptionist and you chat on your phone, all day long, because there is nothing else to do? Guess what. I don’t care. You are paid to sit there and be ready to greet people. You can’t properly greet people if you are yapping on the phone.
• You work on a construction crew and you hold up the SLOW/STOP sign? I don’t want to see a mobile phone in your hand. Ever. Pay attention to your job, buddy.

What are your thoughts?

[Revised with a picture of a security guard standing outside of my local bank—on a break, I would assume, but I didn't see another security guard inside. Maybe I'm not a security expert, but it seems weird to have an armed woman standing in front of your bank, smoking a cigarette, and texting her boyfriend.]

Office worker Mr Coleman, 23, was ‘tweeting’ to his followers on his Blackberry while jogging to work when he cracked his head on a heavy low-hanging branch.

The force of the impact sent the dazed runner crashing to the pavement and left him with a badly bruised black eye. – The Telegraph – UK.